I bite the inside of my cheeks.
I find a sore or a bruise and I press on it.
I dig my nails into the palm of my hands.
I push myself beyond all limits.
I work till I’m completely exhausted.
I do what it takes to feel something/anything.
If all else fails, and i get numb to all the small things.
I can always count on my blade.
My blade is sharp and to the point
I can trust that my blade will always be there when I need it.
I need it more and more each day.
My blade is my weakness.
I know that when the cold metal touches my leg, I will feel anticipation
I know that when that sharp edge tears my flesh open, I will feel a rush.
I know that when I see the blood start to form droplets, I will feel excitement.
Most importantly I will feel!!!